Study: Same-sex marriage ban hurts gay, lesbian, and bisexual mentally

Gay Lesbian Bisexual Mental Health

Photo Credit: Ambro via Freediitalimages.net

Many people stick to their religious views when it comes to opposing gay marriage and refuse to consider anything else in the ‘gay marriage debate’.

The reality of the matter is that many factors are at stake for gay, lesbian. And bisexual individuals living in states where there is a same-sex marriage ban as per reports from NPR on May 20.

A psychologist from Columbia University, researcher Mark Hatzenbuehler explains: “Lesbian, gay and bisexual individuals who lived in the states that banned same-sex marriage experienced a significant increase in psychiatric disorders.”

He goes on: “There was a 37 percent increase in mood disorders, a 42 percent increase in alcohol-use disorders, and — I think really strikingly — a 248 percent increase in generalized anxiety disorders.”

You might be asking yourself how these figures compare to the mental health of gay, lesbian, and bisexual individuals in states where there is no same-sex marriage ban.

Hatzenbuehler reveals: “We showed the psychiatric disorders did not increase in lesbian, gay and bisexual populations in states that didn’t debate and vote on same-sex marriages. There were also no increases — or much smaller increases — among heterosexuals living in the states that passed same-sex marriage bans.”

In the end, people need to increase their awareness of the real issues at hand. Stability, in the emotional, financial, social sense are among the most important factors in the marriage equality movement.

Many are blinded by their religious takes on things instead of seeing what real people are experiencing, not just what the Bible says.

Gay, lesbian, and bisexual people are real people with real feelings.

As productive members of American society, having their intimate relationships recognized by the law that overturns a same-sex marriage ban  is only a beginning.

Addressing the mental ramifications of years of damage from prejudice and discrimination over the years is the next logical step.

Sources: NPR 

Life examples of negative and positive stress

Examples Positive and Negative Stress Life stress can either be positive or negative for you.

How you view a stressor can impact how it will affect you on a day to day basis.

Psychology takes a look at how these stresses make a difference to you and how you feel.

Stresses are factors in life that can influence how you interact with others and how you function on a daily basis.

What are some negative stressors?

Negative stress is potentially overwhelming and perhaps out of your control.

Negative sources can include the loss of a job, medical illness, learning your spouse had an affair, or mental unrest, such as depression.

But what exactly does it mean to experience positive stress and how does it affect our psychological health?

What is positive stress?

Positive examples of stressors, much like negative ones may seem like a bit daunting at times, but is usually something we feel, at least in the psychological sense, that it’s in our control. Here are a few real life examples:

  • Planning a wedding
  • Having a baby
  • Buying your first home
  • Purchasing your dream car
  • Getting promoted at work
  • Finding your true love
  • Getting in touch with an old friend or lost relative
  • Graduating from college
  • Taking a placement exam
  • Going on vacation
  • Landing your dream job

Each of these sources, while positive on the surface brings with it a new sense of tension and anxiety. In turn, each of them may result in your feeling a bit overwhelmed psychologically.

You enjoy each of the activities, even of the baby keeps you up late at night or you have spent many years as a swinging bachelor and decide you’re ready for marriage!

Life changes may result in modified thoughts and feelings, each potentially resulting in stress.

Managing stress in healthy ways such as through exercise, communicating with others, or finding a healthy outlet for your stress, can help you stay sound psychologically. What different sources of stress do you have? Do you consider them positive or negative in nature?

First date jitters: Be prepared for anything

First date jitters tipsChances are when you go on your first date with someone, you usually hope for the best, but you never know what might happen!

First date jitters can get the best of you!

This is not to say that you should expect everything to go wrong, but anticipate that either nature or human error will eventually change something in your plan.

As a pair of singles out on the town, you never know what the day will bring.

Try to head out a bit early if you are meeting your date somewhere. This will help you get there on time, perhaps beating the traffic or some other mishap you might find along the way.

Pack an umbrella if you even slightly suspect it might begin to rain later – being in soggy clothes for the duration of  a date can make you plain cranky!

First dates can be quite memorable, especially if you try to make the most of them. What was your first date like with your spouse or partner?

What are some things that happened that you were not expecting? How did you handle these unexpected surprises or first date jitters? Did they make your date better or worse?

At the end of the day, being prepared, coupled with a positive attitude will help you get out of a sticky situation, or a first date will of crazy unexpected moments!

Can you remember a time when you experienced first date jitters? How did you handle it?

 

Meaning of flower colors for your special Mother’s Day gift (VIDEO)

Meaning of white roses for Mother's Day

Photo Credit: Rosen Georgiev via freedigitalphotos.net

Mother’s Day is when moms, grandmothers, stepmothers, aunts, and those women in your life who are ‘like a mother’ get the love they deserve. This year, Mother’s Day 2013 takes place on Sunday, May 12.

While many moms love to get photographs of their grandchildren, a trip to the spa, or even a nice family meal as a gift. Lots of mothers also enjoy a nice bouquet of flowers to look at, reminding them of their loves ones.

But which flower colors are good for mom this year on Mother’s Day? And what are the meanings of those flower colors?

Well, there are many different rose flower colors to choose from. Once you know the meaning of flower colors, then you are on the right track!

Think about what color mom likes most and start there.

Rose are probably the most popular roses. Other flowers you can consider include sunflowers, hyacinths, daisies, or perhaps even carnations. The meaning of flower colors will help you decide which rose is best for you.

If you go with roses, here is a breakdown of the various colors roses available and the meaning of flower colors according to their color. Hopefully this will help you pick the special rose to honor the special mom in your life as explained by ProFlowers.com:

Red Roses

Red roses are seen as the traditional symbol of love and signify a romantic gesture. If you want to say “I love you!” to your wife on Mother’s Day, this might be the choice for you.

Make sure you give these to someone who you truly care about as they send a strong message of love.

Pink Roses

Pink roses convey a message of elegance and grace explains ProFlowers. Compared to red roses, pink roses send a message of love, but are a bit ‘lighter’ in their message.

This is a good rose to give if you are dating a new mother or perhaps a single mother that you are just getting to know.

Seen also as a message appreciation, they might also be good for someone who is ‘like a mother’ to you.

Yellow Roses

Yellow roses, much like their strong color, send a message of warmth and happiness as revealed by ProFlowers. These vibrant flowers are often associated with strong friendships.

Yellow roses could be the ideal gift for the special friend in your life who happens to be a mom.

If you happen to be getting married on Mother’s Day 2013, then white roses are the perfect flower for your wedding. Traditionally the symbol of purity and new beginnings, white roses would add an image of honor to your special day.

These roses are also a great way to remember those mothers in your life who are no longer around as they are associated with memories of loved ones past.

Orange Roses

Orange roses are the perfect symbol of the desire you have for someone. If you feel especially passionate about a mother in your life, maybe your new girlfriend or your long-time wife, then give her orange roses to show her you still want her as much as the day you first met.

Lilac or Lavender Roses

If you want a unique rose color idea, then go for the lilac or lavender colored roses. These roses have traditionally be used to show your feeling of “love at first sight” for someone. Does any special mom come to mind?

Which roses will you give the special mom in your life on Mother’s Day 2013? Now that you know the different meaning of flower colors, which shade will you choose?

Sources: ProFlowers.com

May flowers inspire you to revisit your New Year’s resolutions

May is National Recommitment Month

Photo courtesy of Stuart Miles via freedigitalphotos.net

May is National Recommitment Month.

What does this mean? It involves taking a look at the goals or resolutions you created back on New Year’s Day and really thinking about the progress you have made since that day. Perhaps they are work related goals, or relationship resolutions.

Whether you are working on things as an individual or as a couple, it’s important to review your resolutions and goals periodically to determine where you are in terms of meeting milestones along the way.

Have you reached kept your New Year resolutions and goals? Do you they need to be revised?

National Recommitment Month is the time to consider what you still want to work on and what is not high on your priority list after all.

Here are a few ways you can review your goals:

  • Are you still work on your New Year’s Day goals?
  • Have you had a change of heart with your New Year’s resolutions?
  • How is the support you have for keeping your resolutions? Do you need more help?

When you consider these questions, are how you doing in terms of staying focused on your resolutions?

Will May, National Recommitment Month, be the month to give your New Year’s resolutions a makeover?

Social worker: Bisexual people real part of GLBTQ community

bisexual female symbolThe GLBTQ community includes gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, and queer people. However, as discussed by social worker Shane Whalley, many times, the bisexual population is left out many discussions.

In a DailyTexan article, Whalley explains what he feels truly defines bisexuality, and why many in the GLBTQ community sometimes fail to recognize the significance of bi men and women as part of the community.

Whalley, also the director for the Gender and Sexuality Center explains:

“Bisexuality is defined as someone who is emotionally, sexually and romantically attracted to more than one sex. This can be more than just men and women but also [transgender people].”

He points out a common misconception:

“Many think that bisexuals are attracted to every gender and that is untrue. Others think that bisexuals are attracted 50/50 to each sex.”

Whalley continues:

“Bisexuality should be a part of the community, but it always isn’t. Society does not like to put things in a tiny box and have choices.”

Biphobia is a real concern for bisexual individuals. Despite being an obvious part of the GLBTQ community, they are considered ‘confused’ or ‘selfish’ individuals. This is not the case.

Awareness. Whalley’s underlying message, helps spread the message that sexuality is a very personal, individual part of a person’s identity, not their sole being.


Video Credit: YouTube

Sources: DailyTexan

Therapy dogs help Boston Marathon bombing survivors heal

golden retriever pet therapy boston marathon bombings

Photo Credit: Lutheran Church Charities via Today

Therapy dogs have long been known to help hospital patients, particularly those involved in traumatic experiences begin the healing process.

On April 18, Time reports pet therapy via therapy dogs is being used with the Boston Marathon bombing survivors.

The golden retrievers, trained by the Lutheran Church Charities in pet assisted therapy, were made available to survivors in the Boston community.

President of the Lutheran Church Charities, Tim Hetzner commented:

“People talk to the dogs — they’re like furry counselors. It’s a chance to help bring some relief to people that are shaken up because of the bombings.”

Some benefits of pet assisted therapies, specifically those that involve therapy dogs,  for trauma survivors include:

Physical Health:

  • lowers blood pressure
  • improves cardiovascular health
  • releases endorphins (oxytocin) that have a calming effect
  • diminishes overall physical pain
  • the act of petting produces an automatic relaxation response, reducing the amount of medication some folks need

Mental Health:

  • lifts spirits and lessens depression
  • decreases feelings of isolation and alienation
  • encourages communication
  • provides comfort
  • increases socialization
  • reduces boredom
  • lowers anxiety
  • helps children overcome speech and emotional disorders
  • creates motivation for the client to recover faster
  • reduces loneliness

(List from Paws for People)

Today notes that one of two of the dogs brought to Boston are actually the golden retrievers taken to Sandy Hook Elementary in the wake of their shooting which took place in December 2012.

Sources: Today, Time

Keeping Your Marriage Healthy: Tips on Dealing with Family Drama

how to handle family issues, family problems, marriage

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Once you are in a long-term, serious relationship, you are pretty much committed to both your partner and your partner’s family.

Things are usually friendly and lovely in the beginning. It’s as though the ‘honeymoon’ phase exists for both you and how your partner’s family interacts with you.

Eventually though, somewhere along the line, you get to know the new people in your extended family as the people they really are.

At this point, you can either run for the hills, or learn how to deal with the family drama that might inevitably come your way.

Here are a few tips on keeping your marriage healthy in the face of family related adversity:

  • Focus on what’s really wrong. If it’s really an external problem, something related to in-laws, cousins, sibling, whatever, keep it there. Don’t make it a problem about your marriage.
  • Make time for each other. The stress of drama can sometimes seep into your relationship. Don’t let it. Make sure you keep the time you spend alone as a couple sacred.
  • Commit to discussing family concerns at times when you will be ok ending the conversation and moving on to something else. In other words, don’t delve into deep-seeded family problems just before bed time.
  • Address family issues with your family. Yes, it’s great to talk about things with your partner when a loved one says or does something that bothers you. But there comes a time when you need to discuss the problem directly with the responsible parties if you want any realistic changes to take place.

How do you handle family problems? Has family drama crept its way into your marriage?

Online counseling offers affordable addictions etherapy options for clients

Many times, clients opt not to get treatment for their present mental health issues because they simply can’t afford it or can’t seem to find the time to stop and really focus on themselves in their busy schedules.

One option is online addictions counseling. Through online addictions etherapy, clients can access treatment when and where they like, for affordable prices.

etherapy online counseling internet therapy

Photo Credit: stockiimages via Freedigitalphotos.net

Online counseling services offer flexibility clients might not otherwise get in traditional settings.

The Lionrock Recovery Power center located in California offers addictions treatment for client by way of etherapy in the form of online group counseling, video-conferencing, and individual sessions as well.

Lionrock CEO Peter Leob discusses these options and their potential benefits for clients:

“Many people now struggling with alcohol and drugs while juggling busy lives don’t get help at all because the available options are too costly, too time-consuming, and too public,”

“Of course, some people need a higher level of care than an outpatient program provides. But Lionrock’s Recovery Power can be a great option, delivering high-quality care from the privacy of home, at a very affordable price, with program schedules that fit busy people’s lives.”

Addictions counseling is a multifaceted program. Tackling the problems that come with addictions may be treated once an individual has begun or completed intense treatment in an inpatient residential program or outpatient program, depending on their needs.

After initial, acute needs are met, online addictions counseling can be a great option for clients looking to avoid relapse.

Sources: PRWeb

Etherapy can help clients feel connected through others in a busy world via the aforementioned methods, video-conferencing, group counseling, and individual sessions, all offered online.