family Archives - Relationships Counseling Today

Hosting your first Thanksgiving dinner, without the stress

November 10, 2012 by BPSTherapy 1 Comment

The first time you host a Thanksgiving dinner, you can be pretty stressed out. By taking a few things into consideration, you can prepare for the festive day, with enough time to actually sit down to count your blessings at the end of the day. As a holiday meant to be spent with loved ones, it’s especially important to get things right for your special day.

A few tips can help you have a stress-free time when you host your first Thanksgiving dinner. Here are a few to keep in mind:

Ask for help. Yes, you are hosting the dinner, but this doesn’t mean you have to go at it alone.
Delegate. If you are having it in your home, ask others who live with you to help you out in prepping things the day of your Thanksgiving dinner.
Prepare a bit at a time. Consider your menu and see what you can start a couple days before – this will ease the pressure of having so many things to complete on the actual holiday.
Take a break. If you are feeling tired or overwhelmed, take a step back. Clear your head and then go back to what you were doing. Things will turn out better if you have a clear hear.
Make a to-do list. This will help you have a visual of what you need to do. Things you can include on your list are meal ideas and decoration inspirations.

Watch a video on how to keep your Thanksgiving dinner stress-free:

Video Credit: YouTube

What are some ways you will make sure your Thanksgiving is a stress-free one? Is this your first time hosting a Thanksgiving dinner? How will you keep calm as you take in the spirit of the season and count your many blessings?

Filed Under: All Topics, Holidays Tagged With: family, holidays, how to, stress, thanksgiving, tips

Mother’s Day gift ideas for lesbian moms

May 12, 2012 by BPSTherapy 2 Comments

Lesbian mothers are celebrating Mother’s Day 2012 on Sunday, May 13. On this day, many families around the world celebrate their mom with gifts for mothers ranging from large gestures letting her know what she signifies to them, to simply sending her a thoughtful greeting card for Mother’s Day.

When Mother’s Day comes around, lesbian mothers enjoy sharing time with their children, friends, and family. As part of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender community (LGBT), lesbian moms represent a special group of parents.

You may want to buy a gift for them that represent this – a gift to symbolize what they stand for in addition to the traditional flowers, dinner, and perhaps relaxing massage.

Lesbian parents may enjoy receiving books from the list of ‘great books for lesbian moms’ presented by Amazon.com. These books embrace the various parenting issues that might be faced by lesbian mothers in their challenge to raise children in a society that often judges them based on their sexuality.

Many of the central ideas in these books teach children about the basic ideas associated with being a family, such as love, acceptance, and community.

If your lesbian mom enjoys showing off her LGBT pride, then maybe she might like a personalized t-shirt from Zazzle! Here you can hundreds of designs you can make special just for her!

Perhaps the lesbian parents you know enjoy the arts! There is a bunch of art available that really illustrates the love within a lesbian relationship. Visit Art.com or Amazon.com to find a great Mother’s Day gift idea for mom today!

So what do you think is best for the lesbian mom on your Mother’s Day gift wish list this year, parenting books, personalized LGBT t-shirts, art, or something else? If you are still not sure, you can always go kind of traditional and get her a bouquet of flowers, a rainbow bouquet that is! Read Mother’s Day gift ideas: Meaning of flower colors for mom to get an idea of which flowers to include in mom’s special gift.

Filed Under: All Topics, Gay and Lesbian Couples, LGBT, Parenting, Relationships Tagged With: family, gay parents, gifts for lesbian moms, gifts for mom, lesbian parents, mother's day, mother's day gifts, mothers, parenting

Mother’s Day: How to celebrate mom with pictures

May 1, 2012 by BPSTherapy 4 Comments

Mother’s Day is celebrated on the second Sunday in May; this year, Mother’s Day is on May 13, 2012.

The relationships shared with moms are appreciated through a variety of gift ideas and gestures including family meals, times with their loved ones, taking the day off from chores, flowers, poems, or taking a day trip out of town.

When mother’s day comes around, you probably start to think of what mom means to you. A creative way to celebrate mom on Mother’s Day and to show her your relationship is important, is to make a statement of how you appreciate mom through photos.

May is known as National Photograph Month – what better way to let mom know you love her than to express it through thoughtful photos.

Some ideas for creating your photographic statement of your relationship with mom is to create a collage of items she enjoys. Perhaps she is a fan of flowers or animals.

Visit the zoo or local gardens together

You could always take a trip to Zoo Miami and take pictures of both the local flora as well as the many animals the zoo has to offer. Mother’s Day can be fun spent alongside nature.

Places such as Fairchild Botanical Gardens and Pinecrest Gardens are both excellent locations to get great shots of flowers for mom as well!

Take your mother to an art show

Is mom a fan of local culture? Coconut Grove and Coral Gables both have a great deal of history. Consider walking around Cocowalk or strolling down Miracle Mile for some interesting photographs of Miami history and bits of culture from the Magic City.

What does your mother enjoy? How can you celebrate Mother’s Day for her during National Photograph Month?

Filed Under: All Topics, Family, Miami, Parenting Tagged With: family, gift ideas for mothers day, moms, mother's day, mothers, national photograph month, relationships, your mom, your mother

Minority LGBT families benefit from extended family social support

March 19, 2012 by BPSTherapy 4 Comments

Minority families will sometimes face adversity in society, whether it be in the form of economic hardship, discrimination for some reason, or even stigma. Families with gay and lesbian parents, who also happen to be minorities, face all of these factors, socially, and then some, because of their sexuality.

However, it appears that while society may not be very supportive of their physical and emotional needs, their extended families reportedly show great social support after the parents come out to them as being gay or lesbian.

The LGBT Families of Color Facts at a Glance report states the following:

In a 2010 survey of LGBT parents of color, the majority of black, Latino and Asian/Pacific Islander LGBT parents said that they were supported by their families as an LGBT person; two of out five said they were “completely supported” by their families.

By contrast, white LGBT parents more often report a lack of support from parents, siblings and other blood relatives—with relationships disrupted as a result of prejudice after coming out as LGBT.

It’s interesting to see the disparity in social support when comparing white LGBT families to minority LGBT families. Social support, for any family, especially a family in need, is vital for their growth as a unit. Family members thrive when they have social support in their pursuit of life goals, educational endeavors, and personal relationships. Do you know a minority LGBT family? How do you see they have thrived with social support from their extended family?

Source: The LGBT Families of Color Facts at a Glance report

Filed Under: All Topics, Family, Gay and Lesbian Couples, GLBT, LGBT, Parenting Tagged With: family, gay and lesbian minority parents, gay and lesbian parents, glbt families, lgbt families, minority gay and lesbian parents, minority parents

Biology strong factor for drug abuse in adopted children

March 7, 2012 by BPSTherapy Leave a Comment

One study published in Sweden has concluded that adopted children whose biological parents were drug addicts or users are more likely to abuse drugs as adults when compared to children whose biological parents were not drug users. Adoption studies have historically been used to answer questions related to the age-old nature vs. nurture debate.

It appears the study, which included 18,000 adopted children, considered the children’s biological background as well as current environmental conditions. The study found that while current environmental factors are definitely influential in a child’s propensity to turn to drugs and alcohol later in life, the biological background a child is born with is inherently a strong predictor of addiction later in life.

One of the researchers involved in the study, which was published in Archives of General Psychiatry shares:

“For an adoptee, having a biological parent with drug abuse who did not raise you doubles your risk for drug abuse,”

“But we also found an important role for environmental factors.”

What does this say for adoptive parents who know their children come from parents who were drug abusers? A positive family life with healthy relationships, for any child, may decrease the risk referred to in the study. It’s essential that parents provide positive outlets for children, ones that allow them to fully express themselves without fear of judgment or punishment. Being able to let others know how you feel can liberate a child and decrease their sense of stress.

Model the behaviors you want your children to display. If you do not want them to drink, try to avoid drinking excessively or not at all in their presence – children tend to internalize many things they see their parents do. What are your thoughts on this study? Do you think children growing up in a healthy environment can ‘get away’ from their biological background?

Source: CBS News

Filed Under: All Topics, Family, Parenting, Relationships Tagged With: adopted children, biological propensity, drug abuse, family, parenting

Happy families created through strong emotional and physical health

February 18, 2012 by BPSTherapy 2 Comments

As a family, you share a lot of things, including both physical and emotional health. One researcher, Dr. Steve Ponder, is stating that the healthier parents were in terms of emotional health as children, the healthier their family will be when they create their family units as adults. Sadly, in his post, Dr. Ponder states that as many as 6 out of 10 adults admit to having experienced both physical and emotional abuse as children.

These parents, while able to recognize the damage done to them, may inadvertently create an unhealthy environment for their children, in an emotional sense. In turn, poor emotional health, coupled with stress, turns into poor physical health – something that Ponder believes turns into ‘chronic disease management’ in the long-term.

Ponder suggest that for families to become healthier, they need to change their focus. What does he mean by this? Consider his quote:

Good things would result immediately from greater attention to the seemingly more mundane needs of our chronically ill children, than from creating more expensive and complex new therapies. One of my greatest secret weapons against diabetes is my social worker; a professional who identifies many of these life problems and offers reasonable and affordable solutions to remedy some of them. But as a doctor, the awareness of these problems allows me the opportunity to shape a diabetes treatment plan that takes the shaky family situation into consideration. Did it work? I only can say at my most recent place of employment, we had one of the lowest rates of uncontrolled diabetes in the United States.

Ponder makes a good point. Society has gotten so that instead of addressing a person, doctors are often treating a disease and forget that behind whatever diagnosis they dish out, there is a real, living person with emotions and feelings. By taking a different look at things, considering where the person is coming from, they may be able to tap into the real reason someone is manifesting certain chronic disease symptoms. What do you think? How do you feel your family fares in terms of being healthy? What about when you visit your doctor or take your child in for a check-up? Are you being treated as a person or a label?

Some suggestions for building a healthier family unit today include:

Create time for each other. Quality time cannot be replaced with material possessions. Children thrive on the attention they receive from loved ones, not from new toys and gadgets.
Spend time as a family, not just as the dinner table. Sharing a meal together is a priceless event. But take this quality time away from the dinner time and find activities you can share with each other. These are where your happy memories will be created!
Listen when you ask a question of a loved one. Don’t just ask someone a question and then walk away. Take the time to really listen to the person’s response. You would be surprised what they want to share with you – especially with children.

Which of these steps are you taking? What changes do you need to make to make sure your family and loved ones are healthy?

Source: MyWestTexas.com

Filed Under: All Topics, Family, Parenting, Relationships Tagged With: emotional health, family, family relationships, healthy families

Facebook Adoption helps families grow

February 16, 2012 by BPSTherapy 1 Comment

Adoption can be a very trying time for a couple facing the challenge of infertility. Desperate to be parents, some couples find they feel disillusioned with the entire process of adopting a child of their own. Facebook however, a powerful social media tool, has been slowly changing the face of the adoption process for these couples seeking to become parents. Instead of going through the traditional roads these would-be parents would face, they are taking to Facebook, creating groups that enable them to network with others in the hopes of finding a child to love.

Adoption is a process that takes its toll on a couple. Whether gay or straight, a couple facing the challenges of wanting to have a child of their own can endure great emotional turmoil as they are turned away repeatedly, either through the foster care system, or through failed fertility attempts. Facebook groups have become a place of refuge, sources of social support, and even avenues by which some couples have found a child to adopt! Couples are opting for either joining these groups via Facebook or creating videos that depict their desire to have a child and what they are looking for.

What do you think of Facebook as a tool for finding a child to adopt? Do you think it’s a safe way to grow your family? Watch the video below to see one couples’ story.

Sources: ABC News, Milford Daily News